I, a bonafide minimalist convert with nearly two decades of living abroad, always experience a wave of excitement that starts a week before my flight back to Vietnam. The anticipation of returning home, reuniting with family, playing with my chubby nieces, and indulging in delicious meals is a constant source of joy. However, this excitement soon turned into a 'crisis’. Upon opening my mom's kitchen cabinets, I was greeted by a plastic kingdom overflowing with mismatched containers.
Let's face IT. We all know IT exists – mom’s kitchen - a treasure trove of mismatched containers, enough plastic bags to rival a grocery store, and a collection of water bottles that could hydrate a small village.
Here's the thing: minimalism might be trending on social media, but for many, especially those of the baby boomer generation, the concept of "less is more" can feel downright foreign. This is because it is rooted in psychological and cultural factors that may not align with their values.
The Relationship between The Scarcity Mindset and The Cozy Life: Unlike us millennials who grew up with overflowing shelves, our parents lived through times of uncertainty. Maybe it wasn't war, but there were hardships that shaped their view on possessions. They held onto things because, “Well! You never knew when you might need them again!”
The "More is Better" Mentality: Culturally, some Asian societies have traditionally valued abundance. More food, more clothes, and more stuff meant security and prosperity. So, letting go can feel like letting go of success itself.
The Emotional Attachment: Sometimes that old sweater from college isn’t just a sweater – it’s a memory wrapped in acrylic. Letting go of these items can feel like letting go of a piece of your past. Totally understandable!
So why are Millennials so Obsessed with Minimalism?
Social Media: We're bombarded with images of sleek, minimalist apartments and perfectly organized pantries. It's enough to make anyone feel like their overflowing sock drawer is a national disgrace.
Psychology of "Enough”: It turns out, humans have a strange relationship with stuff. We buy things thinking they will bring us happiness, but research shows that lasting joy comes from the experiences and relationships we have, not from adding another coffee mug to our collection.
The Rebellion Against "More": We're tired of the constant pressure to consume. Minimalism is a way of saying "enough is enough" and focusing on what truly matters.
The Clash of the Generations
Now, don't get me wrong, I love my Mom. But let's just say her "abundance mentality" (overflowing cabinets) clashes a little with my newfound minimalist ways. Maybe it's the baby boomer spirit of "more is better," or perhaps a lingering "scarcity mindset" from tougher times. Whatever the reason, every time I see her kitchen – a tiny voice in my head whispers (I can only whisper my master plan in the shadows of the night), “Time to unleash my inner Mr. Muscle.”
Whenever I suggest that Mom should embrace minimalism, it's not just about decluttering for the sake of it. There's a deeper meaning behind it: to create a space that fosters peace and well-being. Honestly, all I want is for Mom to be healthy, happy, and surrounded by things that bring her genuine joy (not worrying about where to “hide” all that stuff every time I visit).
The Gentle Art of De-Cluttering
How can we balance respecting Mom’s ways while also freeing up some cabinet space? Here are some tips:
Start Small: Don't expect your mom to become a decluttering zen master overnight. Pick a drawer together, tackle a shelf, and focus on the positive – creating more breathing room for things she actually uses!
Focus on Experiences: Instead of buying more stuff, prioritize creating memories together. I often take my mom out for meals, cafes, spa days, or vacations instead of going to the mall and buying another... water bottle.
Embrace the Humor: Let's face it, sometimes the best way to deal with Mom's overflowing cabinets is with a little laughter. Take pictures, share stories, and turn them into a bonding experience. I've done this many times, actually. I sent a picture of my mom's kitchen during holiday cooking sessions to relatives and cousins, and no one was surprised by it. They all texted back: "Sounds like Mom!"
Minimalism vs. Family Values
As we mature and gain more understanding, we increasingly recognize the generation gap that exists, creating differences in our thinking, habits, and actions. Our grandparents or parents would be different if they lived in a different era, and we, the younger generation, could be just like them if we lived in their time. Therefore, just because we know more and have been to more places doesn't mean we should impose our standards on them. Instead of imposing, it’s better to find a balance between old and new values, to respect our parents' experiences while also forging our own path.
At the end of the day, minimalism is not about depriving ourselves of things. Rather, it’s about making a conscious choice to only keep those things that bring value and joy into our lives. By decluttering our physical space, we can create mental clarity, and free ourselves to pursue what truly matters. Having less stuff doesn’t mean less love, less happiness, or less connection. Instead, it can actually pave the way for a richer and more meaningful life.
So, the next time you find yourself lost in the "Tupperware kingdom," take a deep breath, let it out slowly, roll up your sleeves, and...start sorting it! After all, a little clutter can be a sign of a fulfilling life, filled with delicious meals cooked with love (and generous leftovers), along with a fashion sense that gets "saltier" that only comes with age. And in the process of rearranging those containers and water bottles, you'll not only create a more organized kitchen but also create a deeper connection with your family, with Mom.
Wishing all the incredible Warrior Moms a Happy Mother’s Day for their exceptional efforts in making the world a better place!
Comments